early madness.

 I’m mad at myself, not you. I’m mad for making you a huge part of my life, wasting my time on you, depending on you, thinking about you, wishing for you, dreaming of you, changing for you, and most of all, I’m mad at myself for not hating you when I know that I should. -eletheowl

So, please, just be patient. I’m so afraid to care about someone. I know it seems like I’m this strong girl who can get through anything, but inside I’m very fragile. I’ve had so many things thrown at me, and each one has only made a crack. What I’m afraid of is shattering. -eletheowl

I miss those midnight conversations. I miss how you would make me laugh out of my own frustration. But you just come to know that you get so used to being loved, and in one second it can all come crashing down. Now I know to not let anything get that far ever again, because I didn’t know how I could wake up one morning and have it all hit me. I didn’t know I could miss you this much. -eletheowl

 All of a sudden it hit me. I’m always the one attempting to catch people when they fall. Now I’m beginning to wonder who’s going to catch me? -eletheowl

P. S: counting days to my departure. bye mehdandh. hello jekardah!


xx